Come along for a summer of fun and romanticizing the hell out of life!
6/23/2026-
After a hard few years, too much heartache to list here and overreaching stress of life – I awoke with an Epiphany- I get to choose and I am the creator of my reality.
This summer, I decided to treat my life like a romantic comedy. Think about it – What happens in the rom-com? Life shifts, the main character has choices to make, there are wild adventures and eventually they find their calling. EVERYTHING always works out in a rom-com!! So, I’m simply deciding that everything works out for me and romanticizing my summer is the answer. Not because life suddenly became easy, but because I was tired of waiting for it to begin. This page is my living journal. It’s where I’ll collect adventures, lessons, embarrassing moments, unexpected plot twists, and reminders that healing can also be joyful.
6/24/2026- The Summer Fling Advertisement-
Truth be told, I think we all long for deeper connection. with the amount of screen time and the demands on our lives, we somehow forgot how to make friends and meet people as adults. I don’t want dating apps. I want someone that can match my energy and go play outside with me. So, in true Gemini, unhinged feral witch fashion – I created a summer fling ad! I posted the advertisement below for reference and plastered this baby all over my social media channels. Will I get any responses? Will anyone be willing to truthfully fill out the questionnaire that follows? PS. I am posing video updates to this on Instagram, Threads and TikTok
6/25/2026- The Questionnaire and Responses
Wow, what a show out! I honestly didn’t expect people to have such a positive response. TikTok doesn’t push my videos and so it had zero engagement there, totally not surprised. I’m not and will never be a TikTok fan. However, Threads and Instagram are poppin! Threads have delivered the kindest, most intriguing people to me. I have had a few couples reach out as well. I will say that I had about 75 people ask me for the application. The mass majority have yet to fill it out and return it (I’m not counting on it). An alarming number or people saw the questionnaire and instantly backed out. Which means it doing exactly what I wanted- its weeding out the people that aren’t in it to win it. If you can’t play along, how fun can you really be?! I have had 15 responses and only 3 so far have made it through the gauntlet. 4 applications were automatically disqualified because it was obviously AI answered. 2 were amazing prospects but very much outside my age range (over 60). I truly didn’t vibe with the crude responses and attitude inflicted in 3 of the applicants. I’m sad to report all of have a name that starts with a J. Is that a real red flag? I guess I’m about to find out. They are getting nicknames if this lasts longer than a weekend.
The Best Answer’s so far- What is your third favorite dinosaur? Capitalism (Painter) What tattoo are you most proud of? The Heffalump I got for my mom (Musician, dare I say mine)
6/26/25- Solid Plan
I awoke to more requests and immediately decided to post the application on all socials for people to respond to if they so choose. At this moment I feel very confident in the few that made it through. The musician understood the assignment – far more than anyone else. He sent me a playlist. I’m actually listening to it as I write this. Sharing music is more intimate than physical activity. Music is the way to the soul, not just a body exchange. So, naturally I had to make him a wild playlist in return.
I am excited to report that Saturday is strictly field research, and I will be meeting for vibe checks and deciding where this adventure takes us. I am oddly not really nervous, more excited to see how this plays out. Now, I must go pull out the banana bread and focus on Sirens. However, I will be having a dance party while doing inventory.
*Disclaimer* – I have been without service, roaming the forests and playing with fireworks (both physical and metaphorically). I’m aware that these entries are late and are indeed a recap. I would apologize but sincerely, this is my game and I play it in a way that works for me.
6/27/26- The Vibe Checks
I feel guilty almost. I want to skip right to the good part but the buildup important. I awoke very early on Saturday morning and truly considered calling off the first meeting with Construction guy. I knew that wasn’t fair and the point of this was to finally meet the men behind my questionnaire.
We had arranged to meet at one of my favorite coffee spots, The River Maiden at 7:30 am. I was working with his schedule and this left open the afternoon to vibe check the Musician. I rolled out of bed, not truly feeling alive and made my way to the coffee shop. Maybe it was my lack of sleep, maybe it was the fact that I showed up in sweatpants and a crop top… either way it was just blah. We had talked on and off few a few days leading up to meeting about concerts and even had discussed a first real date to go bowling. He was nice, I paid for his coffee, we chatted for about 30-45 mins but there was no spark. There was nothing that jumped out to me that said- this is the person I want to spend my summer night with.
However, what unfolded right before my eyes that very afternoon made it clear that my champion had been found. The musician had already completed the full questionnaire along with the final boss questions. I was impressed with his thoughtful answers, a playlist i was growing to love and conversations that didn’t stop for days. Every message, even on multiple platforms, flowed and continued to deepen my intrigue and desire to know this person further. I would tell you I didn’t have high hopes, but we both know that is a lie. I was excited and a tad nervous as I pulled into the parking lot of a cute little coffee house that was new to me, Sweet Touch Cafe & Svitoch. Walking up to greet him didn’t feel like meeting for the first time but instead reuniting with an old friend I hadn’t seen in years (a remark he made as well). From ordering coffees to lounging on the couch, our legs lightly touching and conversation that flowed just as easily in person as it did through text. We decided to continue at a bookstore we both had been wanting to explore, White Oak Books. At this point I already knew that he was my choice, but I wasn’t going to pass up a bookstore date. I couldn’t help but think, how very rom com of us. After I walked away with new author suggestions and a thirst to start reading diligently again, he led us to Brickhouse for root beer and fired pickles
What started out as a coffee vibe check turned into 6 hours of exploring each other’s personalities and creating a real connection. I ended up meeting back up with him that evening for a movie and another 3 hours of getting lost in how this human tickles my brain, inspires me and is always up for hearing my crazy theories. 9 hours later and I’m still wanting more.
Needless to say – A local musician with a banjo emerged victorious. We have a partner in adventure for the summer rom com series. “But did I win? Is the game over or is it just starting?”
6/29/26- The Trip Preparations
In true Gemini fashion, I lock in the musician for a summer fling contract and then lead up with “I’m on vacation and out of town with my kids until 7/5.”
Will he lose interest? Will the spell I put on him wear off? Will he wait for me? Will I lose interest? Will the infatuation that built up disappear as I go on this trip, leaving a week between seeing him? Not likely.
I picked up books from the library that he recommended from the bookstore date. I made my mom listen to the playlist as I ran errands for her. I pulled long nights and early mornings preparing for this trip, all the while romanticizing everything I “had” to do. This simple mental shift alone has begun to move things outside of the adventure add.
Romanticize your life. Make everything a side quest. Get a good playlist. Do it for the plot. Find joy and whimsy in the mundane.
*Spoiler Alert* – In this case, absence makes the heart grow fonder.
7/7/26- He Played the Game
I debated posting this, but I feel it’s only fair to me, the creator of my reality. I am no longer explaining to be understood or to defending my choices but to bring clarity to the real intention behind the Rom Com Summer, the application that followed and how I am choosing to build my life in the present moment.
I truly believe that humans need connection to thrive. We need touch, we need laugher, we need to play to be truly alive. We are social beings. We feed off each other; we fill each other up and under the right circumstances we create magic when connected.
I have experienced so much loss the last few years. Loss of a parent, loss of a marriage that I was never meant for, loss of some of the closest friends I had made. I longed for connection. Not because I was lonely, but because I recognize the importance of community. Social media can only do so much, it’s still a screen as a barrier. I wanted real, tangible human interactions.
I was honestly so fucking tired of hearing every astrologer say that Gemini’s were going to have this massive breakthrough in their love life, their social surroundings were going to be upleveled and the connections made were going to change the trajectory of their lives. So, I put myself out there. I decided that I was going to romanticize the hell out of everything in my life and within a few days I posted an advertisement and questionnaire for a summer fling (Can be seen above).
I have had several people reach out and ask why the “failed” the questionnaire, I have had friends explain they were too scared to fill it out, and another that didn’t think I would go through with it.
This was never about dating. I could have opened a tinder. The questionnaire wasn’t stupid. It was curated to go deeper than the surface to find someone that could meet me where I am. Someone that can play along, find the humor AND the greater meaning in it all. Someone that would share books and music with me, go on a hike and try new spots out with BUT also stay up under a star speckled sky discussing conspiracy theories and what is possible in this lifetime.
He didn’t just play the game; he accepted my invitation. He chose to participate in my story as the new character with a hidden identity. He answered as nothing but himself in every scenario I batted his way. He took the time to get to know me and indulge all my curiosities. He allowed himself to be vulnerable while disguised in a humorous application. It was never about dinosaurs, tattoos or finding love. Will he become a lifelong partner? A dear friend? A wonderful summer chapter? I genuinely don’t know. But with wholehearted abandon, I’m going to find out.
7/8/26 – Pickles and Frenchies
Our first adventure as an official summer fling: The Musician had asked me previously what sports I like; which I proudly announced that I am a Baseball fan. His response “No one likes Baseball”. Excuse me, SIR, Baseball is far more entertaining live, and they all wear those great pants. Plus, some of the best rom com movies of our times are baseball themed – Bull Durham, my absolute favorite followed by other great additions such as Trouble with a Curve and Fever Pitch.
Naturally, we must start here at a Portland Pickles game which just happened to be woof Wednesday featuring French Bulldogs and Grey Hounds. It doesn’t get more rom com cliche then this and I’m completely here for it! Unbeknownst to me, this was his first time attending a Pickles game. Somewhere between petting the most adorable Frenchie dogs, eating pickle chips, watching Dillon the Mascot race a woman in a chicken suit and watching the home team take the win- I found myself in a truly new place. I have attended this ball field before, I have sat in these bleachers and enjoyed it every time, but this was different. Our conversation continued to flow as we watched every inning and as the lights tuned on over the field, it felt magical. Not in a shock and awe way but in the glimmer of joy way. The ease of this evening, the amazing company, and the calmness of energy was a delightful surprise as I realized I was exactly where I wanted to be.
7/11/26- Rewriting Memories
We took a day trip to Silverton to hike the Ten Falls Trail. If you have not done this trail, please do not be someone that just parks at the South side, walks down to the first one, films and then leaves. No. You do not get to claim the trail if you don’t complete it. It’s not the same as completing the 8.5-mile loop of various woodlands and waterfalls. We however did skip one waterfall on the north spur, truth be told.
It was beautiful, certainly, but the trail became secondary. The moment I parked my car and stepped out, any lingering anxiety from the morning events evaporated. I was greeted with genuine enthusiasm and sincerity, something I’m realizing I’m still getting used to receiving. The entire day unfolded effortlessly. We talked through the drive, the hike, and dinner afterward, wandering from ridiculous stories to heavier conversations and back again without ever running out of things to say. It never felt forced. It never felt like performing. I laughed, a lot, and smiled continuously. A big, silly smile that I will not shame myself for. My cheeks hurt today. As does my thighs from the continuation of these foreign muscles being overworked. This is my new favorite type of ache- proof I spent the day completely present. We somehow managed to create an inside joke that only the two of us, and maybe one of his closest friends, would ever understand. I already find myself hoping that someday I’ll casually say, “It was okay,” just to see if someone catches the reference.
I can’t quite place the feeling of yesterday or explain how it’s pooled through it my day. It’s not butterflies. It’s grounded and tangible. It’s a deeper knowing that regardless of how this came about, I found someone I genuinely enjoy giving my time and energy to. Someone that has me curious and chasing the next adventure.
Today, while driving kids from one place to another, packing for the lake, and mentally sorting through my endless to-do list, I put on Skinny Puppy – strictly for research purposes, of course. The kids started bobbing their heads. I smiled even harder. And somewhere between traffic lights, it hit me – I wonder if he realizes he’s helping me rewrite memories.
7/17/26- Free Play
I think I’ve finally figured out why I’m writing this and why it’s become my favorite series. It isn’t to document every date or determine whether the Musician and I ride off into the sunset together. It’s because somewhere along the way I forgot that life is supposed to be fun.
I’ve heard the talk about how butterflies aren’t always a good sign. I see now how that could be the case. Every encounter feels natural, effortless and authentic.
Friday night was beautifully ordinary. No grand adventure. No sweeping declarations. Just dinner at one of my favorite restaurants—a place I’ve always kept a little sacred—and the realization that sometimes inviting someone into your favorite places is its own form of vulnerability.
We managed to snag one of the last-minute reservations at Twigs on the Vancouver waterfront. The restaurant was buzzing, the food was every bit as good as I’d remembered, and for the first time I found myself sharing one of my favorite places with someone new. It felt…right.
After dinner we wandered over to Silver Ball Social Club, a place that had been sitting on my “someday” list since it opened. Free-play pinball machines, flashing lights, mocktails, and two overly competitive adults pretending they totally knew what they were doing. My pinball strategy mostly consisted of panic-flipping both paddles at once and hoping for the best. Thankfully, the Musician offered a few pointers, and by the end of the night I was actually winning a couple rounds. Beginner’s luck? Maybe. Am I counting the victories anyway? Absolutely.
Somewhere between pinball machines and sharing a deep-fried Uncrustable (which is WAY better then it sounds), I realized something unexpected. It isn’t about dating again. It is about being available for more and choosing to make time for joy. It was another place that no longer existed only as “something I should do someday. My world keeps getting a little bigger the more I push myself out of my comfort zone. I really like that and I’m excited that I have an adventure partner at my side.
7/22/26- Employee Appreciation Night
A few weeks ago, I jokingly posted a job opening for a Summer Fling. It came with an application, ridiculous interview questions, and a Final Boss round featuring conspiracy theories, and whether applicants would take the long way home. The Musician happened to answer the application exactly as himself. Since then, we’ve wandered bookstores, hiking trails, pinball arcades, movie nights, playlists, and conversations that somehow jump from one subject to another with ease – all while laughing. Last night was “Employee Appreciation Night.” Wanting to spend time with this person and beat the heat that Portland has had the last few days- I devised a plan to learn all their favorite snacks, introduce them to girl dinner and lounge in bed while watching a movie in the crisp air continued room. Hosting Employee Appreciation Night might seem a little extra, but it’s honestly one of my love languages. I like creating experiences. I love putting together a “girl dinner” grazing board, baking something from scratch, making a handwritten sign that makes someone laugh, and turning an ordinary night into something worth remembering. Life gives us enough routine. If I have the chance to make someone feel welcomed, celebrated, or simply entertained for a few hours, I’m going to take it. This whole social experiment stopped being about dating some time ago. It’s become about romanticizing my own life. Making everything a side quest.
Whether this becomes a lifelong friendship, a love story, or simply one of the best summers of my life honestly doesn’t matter. I’m happy with whatever the outcome is and grateful for this season.
7/25/2026 – Living Up to His Alias
I’m currently updating this while dying my hair, chugging a coffee and having popcorn for breakfast. If anything, this just further proves I live in a romantic comedy and chaos is my nature.
I’m beginning to think I nailed it with the nickname “The Musician” as his undercover identity.
Some people show affection with flowers. Others with grand declarations. This man apparently communicates in songs, stories, unexpected food recommendations, and the uncanny ability to know exactly what version of me showed up that day.
Friday evening started at a dive bar with live music, fried pickles (because apparently that’s just our thing now), and a mocktail. It was one of those easy nights where conversation flows without effort, cut short only by a family emergency that pulled me away earlier than expected.
The real story, though, began the next afternoon.
The last week of event -both beautiful and difficult- left me vulnerable and my emotions raw. For the first time since this whole ridiculous summer adventure began, I admitted I wasn’t okay. I sent him a text that made my hands shake after I hit send. I told him I wasn’t my usual spunky self. That I didn’t need fixing. I just wanted company. He cleared his afternoon.
When I arrived, he wrapped me in a hug that quieted everything I’d been carrying. I hadn’t realized how exhausted I was from making decisions until he gently started making them for me. Not because he assumed I couldn’t, but because he noticed I didn’t want to. There is something incredibly healing about someone paying that much attention.
He let me hear a song he’s working on before anyone else. Then we wandered into the backyard where roses were in bloom overhead, and I leaned back to relax while he played the banjo – also playing me one of his originals. At one point he asked, “Can I read you something?”
Reader… He read ME a short story. OUT LOUD. Not just any short story, his favorite.
I am not a Hallmark girlie, but most certainly a dark romantasy woman. If I have learned anything, it’s that reading to someone is dangerously romantic. I have always believed that sharing your favorite music and your favorite books is one of the purest forms of vulnerability. They’re tiny windows into the way someone experiences the world. To offer them freely isn’t just sharing a song or a story—it’s saying, “This is a piece of me.” It is a pathway to your true self and to openly share it, is an invitation. One I will be answering, wholeheartedly.
Later he walked me to one of his favorite neighborhood spots and introduced me to a jianbing—essentially the Asian street food version of a Crunchwrap Supreme, which may be one of the greatest culinary discoveries of my adult life.
Between the music, the stories, the walk, and the meal- I noticed that None of those things were actually my favorite part. My favorite part was simply sharing space with him. I didn’t have to be entertaining. I didn’t have to be funny. I didn’t have to be the one holding space. I didn’t have to earn my place there. I was simply allowed to exist.
For someone who spent the beginning of the summer looking for an adventure, I think I accidentally found something much quieter but equally thrilling. And, if I’m honest, much rarer.
7/29/26 – Full Moon
The Musician and I came to agreement fairly early on in this arrangement. We both have children and creative projects outside of this. We both have lives we are living in tandem to our growing friendship. Thus, there are certain nights that work for us to make plans and others that just don’t make sense. With that being said, I have dubbed my Wednesday evenings as “Playlist Sessions” and I reserve them to spend time with the Musician.
On this particular Wednesday, it happened to be the full moon. I was actively breaking one of my own rules by planning on seeing him. I mentioned that I typically hold those evenings as personal nights to honor the moon phase and stay in touch with my witchy spiritual side. He answered that he had an idea of how to spend this special occasion. When I arrived with tacos from my favorite food, he dropped a history lesson on me about Rocky Butte and Joseph Wood Hill. One of the many things I have come to admire about this person, is that when he wants to know “why” or “how”, he does the research. To a Gemini who loves to learn and is endlessly curious, this is mental foreplay and makes him infinitely more attractive.
He checked the times; he drove us to the spot and made sure we were there in time. He took me to watch the moon rise over the distant hills. He took me to see the moon, in its full glory, He turned an ordinary Wednesday night into a memory I will forever hold close to my heart.
8/1-8/2-26 Weekend Getaway
This trip meant more to me then I think he even realized.
A year ago, I stood alone on that same stretch of coastline. My divorce had been finalized. My girls were out of town for the weekend, and for the first time in my life I packed my own car, drove to Long Beach, and spent the night camping by myself. I remember standing beneath the moon, watching the waves roll in, trying to make peace with everything that had changed. I remember being excited and terrified all and once. I wasn’t looking for adventure. I was looking for myself under all the grief.
This year, I returned. Only I wasn’t alone- I had the musician at my side with a playlist curated for the trip. Though I have visited this area for many years, this trip held a lot of first times and felt new in every aspect. We stayed at a little motel in Ilwaco that I was absolutely convinced was the opening scene of a horror movie. I made no fewer than twelve jokes about us disappearing under mysterious circumstances. The older man checking us in asked if we were in town to fish.
The Musician and I exchanged a look. “…No?”
When we were alone, the Musician asked- Do we look like people who wake up before sunrise to voluntarily catch fish? It turns out… Yes. At least according to everyone else staying there. We were apparently the only heavily tattooed weirdos there for beaches instead of charter boats. For the record, the motel was delightful. The fishermen leaving before dawn were less than delightful.
There was nothing outwardly epic on our trip. We got our fish and chips craving handled at the Loose Caboose. We played on the beach multiple times. We walked the Marina in Ilwaco and the boardwalk in Long Beach. We hiked a small portion of Cape Disappointment. We explored Fort Columbia on the way home. Nothing we did would make anyone else’s bucket list.
On paper, it was wonderfully ordinary. It started before we’d even left town. I forgot my coffee – he turned around without a second thought. We missed our turn in Longview because neither of us could stop talking long enough to pay attention to the GPS. He happily took the Washington side because I wanted to. We spent half the drive playing “Guess the Artist” until I confidently declared, “HOW DARE YOU THINK THAT’S—” …only for him to calmly pull up the answer and prove I was, in fact, spectacularly wrong. I should know better than to challenge the human jukebox.
He never complained when I wanted to drive farther north just to visit my favorite stretch of beach. The sunset never really happened. The clouds stole it from us. So instead, I twirled barefoot in the sand with sparklers in each hand while he lit more for me to play with. There was a superhero moment with him using our beach blanket as a cape.
We wondered aimlessly along streets and drove in circles in and out of our adventures. We joked that we’d somehow slipped into an alternate reality where no one ever actually leaves Ilwaco. There was no tension or frustration when none of our original plans worked out. We simply made new ones. Just two people who kept choosing each other over the itinerary.
On the way home, I asked if we could stop in Cathlamet. It’s a tiny town tied to memories of my grandfather from when I was little. He didn’t sigh; he didn’t check the time; He simply turned the car. That’s becoming one of my favorite things about him. He doesn’t make me feel like my curiosity or nostalgia are inconveniences. He follows them with me.
I’ve said it before- I’m rewriting memories even if that was never the intention. I’m not trying to erase what came before but I’m learning that places can hold more than one story. A beach can be where I mourned one chapter…and where I celebrated another. This trip is proof that great company has a remarkable way of turning ordinary into a whimsical adventure worth remembering.
8/6-8/9/26 – Summer Maxing: The Victory Lap
There are weekends that are busy and then there are weekends where you look around halfway through and think, Oh. We’re really doing this.
This was the latter. My children would tell you that this isn’t out of the norm for me; that I occasionally get a wild streak and optimize our time to the fullest. I am someone that gets their money worth out of everything. I max plan and optimize everything I can.
I have officially declared these last four days of my leave of absence Summer Maxing.
Not because I needed to squeeze every possible activity into the last few days before returning to work but because I wanted to be present for the life, I have spent so much time rebuilding. I wanted to see the people I love. I wanted to make memories with my children while they are still children. I wanted to laugh until my stomach hurt. I wanted to play outside. I wanted to soak up every bit of summer before stepping into several brand-new chapters all at once. And apparently, I succeeded spectacularly.
Thursday — Back to the Mountains
We started with a day trip to Trout Lake to visit my bonus mom, Leslie. The girls were immediately put to work cleaning out the beloved pond, just as my dad had taught them to. There is something incredibly grounding about watching your children continue traditions that existed before they were old enough to understand their significance.
The rest of the day was exactly what I needed. We talked around every table in the house, moving to each with ease. There was no shortage of stories, questions, catching up or laughter. We tried to absorb as much time together as possible.
At one point, Leslie took my face in her hands and really looked at me. She studied me. Then she told me something I wasn’t expecting. She said my eyes had changed. That I looked vibrant. More relaxed than she could ever recall. That I was radiating positive energy. She told me she was proud of me and I couldn’t help but to shed a few tears. This woman was there, she walked with me through my hardest years. We held each other through the most difficult seasons. Her words carry more weight.
She asked about the Summer Rom Com – the application, the questionnaire, the candidates that didn’t make it, and the Musician. I had the opportunity to explain the part that I think people sometimes miss.
The Summer Rom Com was never really just about dating. The dating experiment was one little storyline inside a much bigger experiment. I was treating my whole life like a romantic comedy. I started romanticizing my mornings. My writing, my business, my children, my friendships, my adventures. The mundane errands. The ridiculous side quests. The hard days- especially the hard days! Every aspect was touched.
And as I told Leslie the story of how the Musician and I started talking, how the questionnaire led to our first coffee and how that coffee somehow became a nine-hour adventure, I realized how genuinely happy I sounded.
I told her, with absolute confidence, that I was already happy. I already loved my life. The Musician didn’t create that happiness. He amplified it. He simply walked into a life that was already becoming something beautiful and added another kind of adventure to it.
And the kids backed me up. They echoed that the change started before the advertisement landed on my socials. They also admitted that they have seen me glow and have much more confidence in that time. I think Leslie saw that before I had the words for it.
Friday — The County Fair
Friday was fair day. This is a tradition we’ve kept alive for years. I used to have a best friend who helped me pull this whole production off. In the last few years, I’ve learned how to do it myself.
Every year, I take all the kids to the county fair. Everyone gets to bring a friend. Everyone gets an unlimited ride bracelet and then we max out the fair. This year there were eight kids between the ages of 11 and 17. Some had never been to the county fair before. Some have been coming with us for years. For the first time, my sister came along as my partner in crime. We both got a little teary about the day because we couldn’t completely ignore the fact that three of those kids won’t technically be kids next year.
They’ll be eighteen, graduating and leaving for college. Starting lives of their own. So this particular fair day felt different. It was the end of an era.
Which, naturally, meant I needed to take on the day with wholehearted abandon. They convinced me to get on every terrifying carnival ride imaginable. I was absolutely petrified. I survived- barely but I rode every single one they asked me to. Because someday I’m going to miss being the ridiculous mom who gets dragged onto terrifying rides by a bunch of teenagers. Someday, sooner then I want to admit, I’m going to long for hot August nights surrounded by all my kids, wishing for the simple days full of laugher and screaming as we flip through the air.
Saturday — Seven Teenagers, One House
Saturday was my daughter’s birthday party. Pizza, 2 liters and candy for days. A house full of teenagers and a sleepover. Laughter coming from every corner of the house.
There are moments as a parent when you have to stop participating and simply observe. This was one of them. Seven teenagers taking over my house. Laughing. Eating. Talking. Being loud. Being young.
I sat back and looked at them and realized just how far we’ve come. There was a time when I couldn’t imagine my life looking like this again. Now my home is a place where my kids feel safe enough to fill it with their friends, their laughter and their crazy antics. I wouldn’t trade that chaos for anything.
Sunday — The Lake
Sunday morning, my other sister helped me load up the cars and we packed everyone up again. Kids. Friends. Canopies. Paddleboards. Snacks. We took over one of our favorite lake spots for the day.
My oldest daughter asked me to take a paddleboard ride around the lake with her. So we went, just the two of us. Somewhere between the sunshine and the water, she started talking about college. Her fears. Her uncertainty. How much is about to change.
And then she said something that broke my heart a little: She just wants to be a kid for a little longer. She doesn’t want to make these decisions. She’s not ready to grow up.
I understand because there is a part of me wants that too. Not to keep them from growing. Just to freeze this particular version of us for a little longer. The one where everyone is still close enough to pile into cars and head to the lake. The one where I can still convince them to spend an entire day with me. The one where childhood hasn’t quite ended yet.
So, I paddled as she leaned on me and I listened and I tried to memorize it.
And then… The Encore
After four straight days of family, friends, sunshine, chaos and more activity than any reasonable person should attempt before starting a new job, I went to spend the evening with the Musician.
I’m keeping that part of the story for myself. Some chapters are meant to be lived rather than documented. But I will say this: We had a beautiful, intimate evening together. It was exactly the right way to close out four days of Summer Maxing.
The Victory Lap
Monday, I started another new chapter. A new job. New routines. New responsibilities. Sirens Charm continues growing. The blog continues evolving. The journals are taking shape. Somehow, in the middle of all of that, I’ve built a life that feels like mine. That’s what this summer has really been about.
I thought romanticizing my life meant pretending everything was beautiful. It doesn’t. The hard things are still hard. Plans still fall apart. Clouds still steal sunsets. Kids still grow up. People leave. Grief still exists. Life is still messy and complicated and sometimes painfully ordinary. But I’ve learned that I get to decide what I pay attention to.
I get to take the long way home. I get to buy the ridiculous ride bracelets. I get to dance in the sand with sparklers. I get to drive to the mountains to see someone I love. I get to sit beside my daughter on a paddleboard while she tells me about her fears. I get to fill my house with teenagers. I get to make art. I get to write. I get to build things. I get to fall for someone. I get to laugh. I get to be ridiculous. I get to be alive. And maybe that’s the biggest plot twist of all.
Romanticizing my life didn’t change the circumstances of my life.
It changed the way I experienced them and in doing so, my life really did begin to change. So, this is my Victory Lap. Not because I’ve arrived or “made it”. But because for the first time in a very long time, I’m not waiting for my life to begin. I’m already living it.
And there is still 6 weeks of summer left…
8/12/2026 – A Night Under the Stars –
I would probably be too punny to start off with the stars aligned – but they did. Both figuratively and literally. This is the night of the annual Perseids Meteor Shower that peaks on my daughter’s birthday (Aug 12th) every year but are technically are active from July 17th to about August 24th. I have always held this night as sacred and loved making a little event out of it. This year, it fell on the solar eclipse, a new moon AND 6 planets aligned!
In the years past I have taken my children on various excursions to witness the stars falling from the sky. However, this year, they all had plans and were trying to soak up every last drop of summer before school started.
Enter the musician. He had already taken me out to see the full moon rise over the hills and now upstages even himself by offering to drive us out to a great viewing location. We ventured out to a local state park and found a great field to lay down blankets in. As always there was a lot of laughter, stolen kisses, and waiting for the show. We were very fortunate enough to have this spot *almost* all to ourselves. The shooting stars did not disappoint! We watch a few really spectacular displays streak across the sky before heading back into the city. It was simple. It was beautiful. It was exactly the kind of evening I would choose every single time.
I will forever be the girl that values these adventures and moments far more than anything money can buy. I’m the girl who would rather receive a song because it reminded someone of me, or a handful of wildflowers picked along the way, than an extravagant gift. I would rather dance barefoot under the stars to whatever song happens to be playing on the radio than have the latest trend delivered to my door.
Give me a blanket in a field. A late-night drive. A good conversation. A ridiculous joke. A person who wants to stop and look at the sky with me. That’s the good stuff.
And as I’ve continued to romanticize my life—in more ways than one—one thing has become increasingly clear: I really like having the Musician as my adventure companion. There are moments when I find myself wishing summer would slow down so I can savor it just a little longer.
8/19/2026 – Sunset Paddle
When I started this blog and the rom-com series, it had been living inside my heart for quite some time. Never did I imagine I would put out an advertisement for a summer fling, much less except to meet such an interesting human. A delightful surprise, even for me. That was just one thread of a much larger story.
I had been healing for so long, although I believe now we are never truly done healing, that eventually I became tired of waiting. Waiting for the right time, waiting to feel ready, waiting to begin again. My life had been stripped down to the studs and eventually it dawned on me: I had the realization that this was my opportunity to start rebuilding exactly the way I wanted to live.
Free of restrictions. Free of arbitrary limits. Free of waiting for permission. So, I embarked on treating my life like a romantic comedy. I started doing things for the plot. I started romanticizing the mundane. I started looking for the magic. I started creating whimsy.
Being ridiculously optimistic and choosing joy does not mean I have forgotten that life can be hard. There are still bad days. There are still frustrations and setbacks. This week has certainly had its share. I’m navigating some difficult circumstances, friction within family dynamics, transitioning into a new job while continuing to build my dreams, and stepping into a lot of unknown territory as my life continues to unfold. To say that it’s been wild would be an understatement!
I could get really woo-woo witchy here and talk about planets changing signs, eclipse season, the fates, the universe, reality and my ongoing theory that absolutely everything is connected. But I’ll spare you my in-depth astrological dissertation. For now.
(If you want to have that conversation, you know where to find me.)
So, as my plans changed for the umpteenth time this week, I finally decided: Enough.
Sometimes all a girl needs is a tank of gas, a carefully curated playlist and a hot summer night. After taking care of all my mom responsibilities, I changed clothes, loaded up my long board, rolled down the windows, turned the music all the way up and drove. I only stopped long enough to check the time of sunset. Apparently, the universe decided I needed it last night and getting into the water was just want the doctor ordered.
As I paddled out on the lake and watched the sun disappear, I gently reminded myself of a few things:
I can be delusionally optimistic and have full faith that everything works out but still recognize that the road isn’t going to be easy. I can still choose joy even when its hard and that duality is the pure essence of my soul.
That free will is a beautiful thing. I get to do this my way. I can drive out to paddle, take myself on adventures, dance whenever I want and truly LIVE. It’s my responsibility to do so and romanticizing my life is one of the ways I have opened that up.
I’m incredibly grateful to have made it this far and still see that I’m not done yet. I can be present, playful and seek adventure while not loosing site of the big picture. I can be completely locked into my goals, continuing to push myself toward growth, while simultaneously soaking up as much of right now as I possibly can. I don’t have to choose. They get to exist at the same time.
As the sun fully set and the lake went dark, I packed up my things and made my way back to the car. And because apparently, I am incapable of ending an evening normally- I turned on my headlights and twirled to one of my current favorite songs. I laughed at myself.
Basking in the night sky, radio up, realizing again – this is my story; I get to rewrite as I see fit and maybe that’s the beautiful chaos of healing.
8/22/26 – Music Among the Trees.
This has been on the calendar for some time, and I would be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous.
The musician had promptly invited me along as his plus one for his friend’s anniversary party shortly after we started this adventure. This was no ordinary anniversary party. This was celebrating 30 years of marriage at the music venue their home had grown into over the years.
I was warned that he would know many people there, among other items. I had heard many stories at this point about the roots this place had in his friendships but equally in his past.
So, naturally I had a total melt down over what to wear.
I was almost desperate enough to ask him to contact his daughter-in-law—whom I hadn’t even met yet—to find out what she was wearing so I could conduct an appropriate vibe check from there. Instead, I told myself to calm my crazy down and just go with something that was cute but practical. Reminding myself this is an outdoor music venue not the Met Gala.
Spoiler, I was still – slightly – overdressed. It’s fine.
I almost cancelled. My to-do list was screaming at me. I was overwhelmed. My anxiety started doing that thing where it convinces me that staying home would be the responsible choice. Fortunately, I have wonderful friends and have become chronically self-aware enough to recognize when I’m doing it.
I voiced my feelings and was instantly met with: “DON’T YOU DARE CANCEL” and “GET YOUR ASS OUT THERE!”
I however did maintain an escape plan just for good measure. Apparently, growth doesn’t mean I’m going anywhere without an emergency exit. Why I ever thought I would need it seems really silly now. The evening was magical. The property itself is stunning and hearing the stories of how it evolved over the years brought me back to the little town I used to call home. There was something wonderfully familiar about a place that had grown organically around music, friendship, and community.
He wasn’t exaggerating when he said he would know most everyone there. Even so, he never let me feel out of place. I’m not sure if that was intentional or not but either way it was appropriated. I was blessed with more stories. A further glimpse into his world and how its evolved. The night was kicked off with music Soul Progression, reuniting for the first time in many years. Later, Glitter and Gasoline closed down the party with covers. Their singer is absolutely amazing and her vocals had everyone enthralled.
She even sang a few county songs. Much to the profound disgust of my Musician. I think what offended him most wasn’t necessarily the country music itself, but the fact that I knew every damn word. Had I been anywhere else, I probably would have been on the dance floor immediately, operating entirely on muscle memory from years of dancing with my father.
He informed me on the drive home that this was a deal breaker. He’s only half kidding. 😂
But as beautiful as the music was, it wasn’t what that left me in awe. It wasn’t the lights. It wasn’t the property. It wasn’t even the fact that I was getting another glimpse into this fascinating little corner of his world.
It was the love. The love contained in this space. I watched the lead singer from Soul Progression light up when she saw people she hadn’t seen in years. During their performance, people handed her two children to hold. She stopped to hug people. Friends reunited. Old connections were rekindled.
There were little kids dancing all night long. I couldn’t stop thinking about the memories being made right in front of me. Those kids are going to remember this. Maybe years from now they’ll hear a particular song and remember running around underneath those trees. Maybe this will be the night they first fell in love with live music. Those are the memories that become part of us.
And then there was the woman we were actually there to celebrate. I watched the bride throughout the evening as she celebrated the beautiful life built with the man she loves. Their family and friends gathered. People from their past, present and the life still unfolding in front of them.
She twirled. She hula-hooped. She danced with a toddler on her hip. Her husband came out from the behind the sound booth to dance with her. She glowed and her happiness was intoxicating. She was absolutely beautiful. She was beautiful because she was completely immersed in the life she had built.
Watching her gave me pause. I realized that I won’t have a thirty-plus-year love story like theirs. Long-form anniversaries may simply not be part of my particular ending. Strangely, that didn’t make me sad.
It just made me very clear about something I have been writing about all years. I know what I want to do with whatever time I have left. I want it to be full. I want gatherings and laughter and endless playlists. I want people I love crowded around tables. I want children dancing underneath trees. I want stories that get better every time they’re retold. I want to be the woman still twirling when everyone else has gone home. I want to dance with a grandbaby on my hip someday.
And yes— I want someone to sway to the rhythm of life with me underneath the stars.
My life won’t look like the traditional love stories and that’s okay. I’ve spent the last several months learning that I don’t need to inherit someone else’s definition of a beautiful life. I get to write my own.
And on this particular night, underneath the music, lights and trees, surrounded by people celebrating thirty years of choosing each other, I was reminded of exactly why I started all over. I feel truly honored to have been allowed into this celebration and it easily is one of my favorite summer memories.
The Chaos of Healing 